"It is God who designed change to be a process and not an event. It is God who chose to put flawed people together in the intensity and close proximity of the intimacy of marriage. It is God who designed marriage to expose your heart, to take you beyond the borders of your own strength and wisdom, and to mature and grow you as you quit relying on yourself and begin to seek the help that only God can give. It is God who created marriage as a workroom to form you into a person who loves as you have been loved and finds joy in giving the same kind of grace that you have been given. It is God who knew that the messiness of marriage would be productive in advancing the work that he began in us when he adopted us as his children. . . . God's goal is that you marriage would be a major tool in his wise and loving hands to rescue you fro claustrophobic self-worship and form you into a person who lives for nothing smaller tan his kingdom, his righteousness, and his glory. God's goal is to transform you at the causal core of your personhood - your heart."
-Paul Tripp, What Did You Expect?, 243-44